Monday, September 26, 2011

This is what it's like learning to play Rugby.

Okay, when we're out there,

I want you to ignore
your instincts.

I'm gonna be your instincts.
Koonu will be your instincts.

Don't do anything.

Don't try to
surf, don't do it.

The less you do,
the more you do.

Let's see you pop
up. Pop it up.

That's not it at all.

Do less. Get down.
Try less. Do it again.

Pop up.

No, too slow. Do less.

Pop up.

Pop up.

You're doing too much.
Do less. Pop down.

Pop up now.

Stop. Get down.
Get down there.

Remember, don't do anything.

Nothing. Pop up.

Well, you... No, you
gotta do more than that,

'cause you're just
laying right out.

It looks like you're
boogie-boarding.

Just do it. Feel it. Pop up.

Yeah. That wasn't quite it,

but we're gonna figure
it out, out there.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

When you own pets you talk of crazy things.

" Livers could look like testicles."

"Think of all the dogs we can save from invasive ball searching nonsense?!"

"We can't get Tom Cruise involved. We both have couches we like."

Thank you, Enny <3

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Aerodynamic

Shauna: LMAO
I also have a cyst on my left boob. Bitch made it obvious cause now my tit hurts!!
*in my

Me: Fun fun, can you pop it?

Shauna: O.O Its IN my boob.
It just hurts now cause she kept pushing on it...then had ME push on it. OW

Me: ...your point? ;);)
What do they want to do about it?

Shauna: O.O Youre creepy sometimes ya know?? LOL
Nothing. They said it's just a fluid filled cyst and they're normal to get. Mom has a couple in the same breast.

Me: I am well aware that my creepy factor is a little high, I'm okay with this.

Shauna:LOL

Me: What is it with your family? First the three labias and now the cysts?

Shauna:LMFAO
IDK
I have four labiae....just one is almost non existent. LOL

Me: 3

Shauna:OOOOH! Do you wanna know what your uvula does!!?? (I have 4 LOL)
Keeps food from going into your nasal cavity. ;);)
Not fool proof....but it USUALLY works. LOL

Me: ...Shouldn't you have 1?

Shauna:LMFAO
I have 1 uvula and 4 labiae. >_<

Me: No, you have 1 uvula and 3 labia

Shauna:Want me to count my labiae for you? o.Oo.O
I has 4
not 3
foooooooour

Me: Half sized ones don't count.
If you must you have 3.5

Shauna:LMFAO
LMAO
Better than 3 I guess.

Me: True

Shauna:LOL

Me: I this makes you a little more aerodynamitc
aerodynamic

Shauna:XD HAHAHAHA
Thanks...thanks...

Me: You're welcome.
OMG SHAUNA

Shauna:what???

Me: You need to do this.

Shauna:what??

Me:
You need to do this because I'm already peeing a little trying not laugh about how epic it'll be.

Shauna:O.O
scared


Me:
You need to shave racing stripes in your pubic hair. It'll make you go faster. Then run around around going "Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrooooooooom vrrrrrooooom"
aerodynamic = racing stripes

Shauna:ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!
...no...

Me: -.-
yes.

Shauna:HELL no

Me: Yes or I'll slip you a roofie and do it myself.

Shauna:o.o

Me: Right before Rocco comes home too.
I'll even write "Vroom vroooom!" on your thighs for him.
OH MAN, that means he can ride you like he stole you!
:O:O

Shauna:I'm not putting racing stripes in my pubs and running around....
LMFAO

Me: ...but it's hilarious!
D:

Shauna:It IS hilarious but NO. LOL

Me: Pfft. Kill joy.